I am a pacifist in philosophy and a hypocrite in practice. Anyone who is not a hypocrite has a worthless philosophy of life, since it doesn’t give him anything to reach for. I cannot judge another for the difference between me and a murderer is only a matter of degree; like everyone else I survive by the consumption of life. We were taught, “Thou shalt not kill,” (Exodus 20:13) yet our own lives are sustained by death. The consumption of life is the nature of fallen man’s existence.

When Adam and Eve were thrown out of the garden, God made them clothing out of animal skins (Genesis 3:21). I was told on Facebook, “That was the first sacrifice for man’s sin.” Thus is the traditional origin of a manner of life that is sustained by death.

An early Christian exegesis of Genesis 3:21 is given in the apocryphal Book of Adam and Eve 52:2: “Then Adam said unto Eve, "O Eve, this is the skin of beasts with which we shall be covered. But when we have put it on, behold, a token of death shall have come upon us, inasmuch as the owners of these skins have died, and have wasted away. So also shall we die, and pass away."” Just as we live by virtue of death, so shall we die, our death providing life to the worms that consume our corpses as we become part of the same cycle.

There is an ultimate harmony and balance in the universe. We enjoy the peak of the sine wave, that eternal representation of the circle, consuming life for the maintenance of our own lives, but we must ultimately enter the valley where our own life is consumed to sustain the life of the worms that eat our flesh. There is much eastern influence in Christianity, although a western upbringing may hide it from our eyes.

The ultimate symbol of life by virtue of death, or the consumption of life, is Christ on the cross. Christian doctrine tells us that through his death we enjoy true life.

Jesus, in his teachings, taught the maintenance of the universal balance by minimizing the consumption of life. “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God,” Jesus taught, among other statements against riches. I cannot seek wealth, because that involves consuming more life than is necessary to sustain mine. Seeking balance in life and a harmony with the universe is the ultimate goal that can be attained through living in accordance with Jesus’ teachings.

“Love your enemies” (Matthew 5:44) precludes me from becoming a soldier or even a police officer, because killing or being willing to kill another is an expression antithetical to love. “Judge not” (Matthew 7:1) precludes me from despising the soldier or police officer because I am still a killer; though I don’t kill people I sustain my life through the death of other forms of life. Likewise it precludes me from serving on juries or as a judge, since being evil myself I cannot do justice by violence toward another who is evil.

We are told that sacrifice by the shedding of blood ended with the death of Christ who provided the ultimate and final sacrifice, but blood sacrifice continues daily. Look at your dinner plate. Both cow and carrot were sacrificed to sustain your life, just as Christ was sacrificed to give you true life. Done in the correct spirit, the daily meal ritual is a memorial that life is given through death, and we are thus encouraged to avoid excess.

Plant life is the visible representation of live freely given to sustain life, the origin that sacrifices itself to sustain life rather than consume life. This is the ultimate symbol of pacifism. It is appropriate that the tree is the representation of Asherah, the traditional wife of God. The warlike Israelites were prohibited from worshipping Asherah (Jeremiah 7:18). Such a pacifist god cannot appropriately be worshipped actively in any case. Were one inclined to worship Asherah, it would have to be done passively by obedience to the commandments of Christ -- that is, by not using violent means to resist evil.

What of the resurrection? Draw a circle and mark the bottom as “nirvana.” This is the beginning and the end of the circle. Nirvana means that one neither acts nor is acted upon, and is free from passions. It could be considered as nonexistence, or as a passive state. The sine wave, however, traverses the circle throughout eternity, alternating between active and passive states. “And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.” (Genesis 2:2)

Death -- entrance into nirvana -- provides our escape from the earthly cycles of life consuming life, but the universal cycles continue. Rest is a counterpoint to work, and for either to be satisfying there must be a balance between the two. Just as the sign wave represents the eternal round, the universal cycles continue on forever to maintain harmony between light and dark, work and rest. Death marks the beginning of new life. The body decomposes and becomes a part of the natural world in which it had its origin, and continues the cycle of life and death.

Life after death is a powerful symbol for those who hope to keep their identity in the great beyond. We are frightened by ghosts, yet ghost stories give us hope. Ghosts, near death experiences, and visions provide witnesses for those who desire to believe in a continuation of identity.

The resurrection is the symbol by which we hope to escape culpability for living via death. We may kill, but life continues on. We are commanded not to take this to excess: “Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” (Matthew 6:24) The concept of judgement means that we must answer for our actions. “Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy” (Matthew 5:7) is the principle here. We must be merciful both in judgement of others, and in sparing God’s creatures when we do not need them. The cycle -- life after death -- can excuse us from the consumption of life to sustain our own lives, if done with proper gratitude for the sacrifice, but not from upsetting the balance of the cycle through our own excesses.

This is the hypocrisy of the pacifist: that life is sustained by death. Hypocrisy in this case can be a good thing. It forces us to hope for mercy which would be beneficial both to the pacifist and the soldier. It encourages humility, strengthening both our effort not to consume more than we need, as well our resolve to avoid non-peaceful activity, such as service as a soldier, police officer, judge, or jury member. The resultant humility also allows us to hold in equal esteem the soldier and the pacifist by causing us to be nonjudgmental. Each individual’s spiritual path is unique.

Coming to terms with the horrific realization that others die in order that we may live allows us to properly appreciate the sacrifice of Christ. We are motivated to seek balance in our lives and harmony with the universe. In this way we learn to worship God in the proper manner.